28 December 2005, Manila - It's something awesome, taking a bath in the morning, or in the sunny-part of the day. I guess that is because of taking a bath every day at 7:30PM or 8:00PM every work day is like a big task that you endure while you are working - every time a drop of water goes from your head to your toe, the distinct kind of coldness lulls you to sleep. But this time, going on a work shift during the day (2PM to 10PM), the coldness of the Christmas season is acceptable and in fact very much welcome. It wakes me up instead of pulling me back to bed.
I will miss this. Anyway, I'll be going back to the real world soon...
* * *
Waking up, getting out of bed, and walking downstairs, I sit down. Today, the real effect of the transfer hit me. I tried to rationalize the effect of being transferred, but I was just taking things inside, I don't want people to know what I feel. I feel betrayed. But then, I rationalized it with, "if I were in his position, would have made the same decision?" I know, I wouldn't, but I have to understand that he is thinking of the numbers that have to be presented to clients. It's just that for me, even though I came from a military background, the objectives are equal to the cost and the people behind the achievement of those objectives. People think that military people are not people-based or insensitive - on the contrary, they could be the most empathic people on earth. They take lives in front of their eyes without showing emotion - could there anything be more emotionally challenging and affecting than that? They hide their emotions behind the reason of "mission." In this situation, people who do not know how it is to be below do not know what they could and must feel.
What will this day be? Should I file my resignation? When? Will I wait to feel what it would be like?
I have always coped with challenge. In ROTC, I also thought of quitting. But then, after being given the anthology lines, like "you never can tell how close you are, you may be near when it seems afar," and "it's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit," mixed with thoughts of faith... I either stick it out or shape up. I believe in these six magic words which the Corps has taught me, "This too shall come to pass." The concepts of success, have been put in my heart - Anthologies, Classmates, Time Management and Stability under pressure (ACTS). These concepts make me stay and fight on. Perhaps, these words make me sort of childlike. I don't care. If that is what it takes to pull off this challenge, I will stick here.
* * *
Disposing people is not as easy as it sounds. But some other people do it without any hesitation. Well, if you look on papers and numbers and not on people at work, then people will be nothing but employee numbers or NT logins, not people striving to do their job to meet the team standards and be part of the team.
* * *
Having fun. Four days of no work is definitely fun. Coupled with being with your family on Christmas - I wasn't with my family last year just to go to work. Now, I have the opportunity of staying at home and celebrating the Christmas with my relatives. That's one thing I appreciate with this temporary change of assignment.
* * *
Don't bring your work away from your station. In NHO, they taught me that. But if you don't do that, how can you become efficient? Besides, how can you talk to people - as in converse with people and not with devices talking to your ears - without thinking and considering what will happen at the end of the call? That's what makes a person different from a computer or a PABX!
Sincerity is not a sound - it is an attitude. But people think they can sound it without meaning it. Well, they can, I cannot. I've been a perfectly good liar in various tasks, but not in this job.
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